I managed to give away tomorrow!  Super excited...tomorrow is my cleaning day.  Gawd knows my place needs some cleaning!  I wanted to work tomorrow but since it is really great weather,  I decided to give it away.  I can't believe how easy it was to give it away.  Seriously how many people do you know that would want to work on a Saturday when it gives t shirt and shorts weather?

I have my day planned out completely so I can make the most of my time since it will be the only day in for the necxt  8 days!  Cleaning in the morning, going to st stephen in the afternoon and then hang out my clothes!  Did I mention that I have a ton of house work to do?

Today was a much better day than the last couple I have had.  I'm  Kinda excited about tomorrow.

watching daybreak, chase shadows from you, as you cling to sleep
there's a moment in my world, when I don't want to breathe
just want to be silently close to you

I see myself as a hand me down, all broken in
I see myself tattered and torn, I can be brand new
when I'm close to you

Don't ever let anyone ever tell me what it is they think I need
Because they've never seen the way you look at me
As if there's something in me that nobody else can see
I keep one hand in the filth of my life, one hand I keep for you
You bring me up, you bring me out, you bring me in
I want to be, I want to be close to you

when I'm close to you
you never see things the way I did
instead I find I ain't satisfied with the man, the man I think I am

anything you want, anything you need
I want to be the one you come to, I want to be the one you run to
I want to be the only one to, I want to be close to you

You've been too far away

I always find with losing weight I find other ways to be destructive.  This time is no exception unfortunately!  Sometimes I get to carried away with one thing I tend to neglect the fact that I had other bad habits before that I just can't afford to have now.

I have been working alot lately to fill in the time and space in my life.  Decisions are best made after lots of time in the thinking process.  I go to work to think!  I always spread around my thoughts and feelings on paper  before I make any desicions in haste and have any regrets but for some reason yesterday was different.

Yesterday I got done work early and had way to much time on my hands.  I made a mistake that I cannot change and it could really effect me. 

The only good thing about making the mistake is that I only hurt myself and in no one shape or form does anyone else know.  I am so scared to tell anyone because I am afraid that they would freak.  I really don't need anyone to over react to something that I have no idea how to deal with yet!

I am think I should just keep quite, but I need advice too.  I am so confused!

Bonus point to the whole situation is that I am working over time until midnight.  Hopefully I will be to tired to go anywhere but home! 

I have been working out faithfully 3 times a week for about a month and plus walking and other things.  I am so glad it is finally paying off.  I am feeling better about myself and I find it easier to do things already!  I couldn't believe it when I took my measurements around my bust and stomach today.  1 inch around my bust and 3 around my bell/hips.   I am so excited.

I have decided  that even though I usually work at 8 am, I am making mt trip to the gym in the morning.  This way I will have time to spend doing other things in the evening when the weather is nice.  I am super excited!